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So, here’s the deal.  What started out as a seed for a simple blog entry has turned into more of a project.  Some time ago I solicited my socnet for input and help in creating a playlist that a person might play to their daughters; hoping that they would get the right messages from the songs and the play list could help shape them while it entertained them.

The Youtube playlist below is the result of that solicitation.

Today as I was mastering (which, soon, you will see I didn’t finish doing) the play list I realized a few of things.  First of all, I cannot possibly put all of the songs of value into one reasonably sized play list. Secondly, I also cannot properly express the value (to me, anyway) of each of these songs by putting them in a playlist.  Finally, I realized that neither me, nor my dedicated (but rather small) socnet are going to be able to capture everything I want to say with what is available to us in our musical lexicon.

With all of that in mind I am expanding this little blog post into a not so little project.  A project designed to capture as much musical knowledge from my friends as possible, harness the knowledge and lessons therein, and share it in a meaningful way.

More details on that over the weekend (once I have fully wrapped my head around it).  But, since you all have been so patient waiting for me to put this list together… without further ado… the opening salvo in this little musical journey…

An hour (plus) that just might leave you better than it found you

Ps… I think my love affair with Christina Aguilera and India Arie shines through pretty clearly here, ironically, though, I did not contribute to this list, it is 100% provided by friends.  It appears my friendship “apple” doesn’t stay far from its “tree” either

PPS please please please suggest more songs in comments… I am beyond eager to have more great songs to listen to and share!!!

An old (and former, to be honest) friend of mine used to say something along the lines of “you don’t see a person for who really are until you see them at their worst” (meaning seeing them in the worst circumstances - i.e. facing adversity).

I have never agreed with that statement, however.  I believe that how a person acts and reacts to positive situations is as important and telling as how they react when the chips are down.  And every shade of grey inbetween is also just as valid a reflection of hat person.

Some people respond well to stress and become “more than they usually are,” others, who excel on a day to day basis, shrink some from adversity.  Neither of these extremes is a blueprint for a better or worse individual, in my mind.

Having said all of that, I am still impressed when someone, facing a difficult situation of their own is able to look beyond themselves and think of others.

One of my online friends, known on the internet as Topsurf has recently stood out to me in this area.  Without going too far into her personal life, her father is suffering from a bout with cancer and has been receiving treatments.

In addition to love and support for her father, what has come from her time in the hospital is this

http://layersoflove.wordpress.com/2010/02/24/hello-world/

In short, she has started up a blanket drive to stock the shelves with fleeces (the preferred blanket of patients in treatment rooms, I have learned).  I’ll let you read the rest in her words.

Another old friend of mine, from high school actually, used to always say “a friend is someone who thinks of you, while others are thinking of themselves.”

Thanks Toppy… for being a friend to those nameless and faceless people you will never even know; but who will find warmth and comfort because of your efforts.

If you have read my blog for a while, you are aware of my friend Alison and her project 365 blog. If you are not familiar, in short, she has dedicated her blog to being publicly thankful to the people in her life (no matter how ancillary they might or might not be).

Yesterday, she wrote a piece (http://300sixtyfive.blogspot.com/2009/12/day-290-non-rushing-one.html) that exemplifies why I so enjoy reading her work.  Alison recognizes little things that often go under-appreciated, ignored or just missed altogether.

I have been the driver of that minivan and, I am ashamed to say, have also been upset when they don’t acknowledge the gesture. Every time I have done that I have subsequently felt small and petty.  I didn’t let them in to get thanks, so why do I get upset when I don’t get it?

The simple reality, though, is that people who do good things (no matter how large or small) should be recognized for it and should be encouraged to continue.  In my opinion, that encouragement is as good for the accolader as it is for the accoladee, as the positive aspects of the act are reinforced for both.

I guess what I want to say is, thanks Alison!  It makes my life more pleasant knowing there are people out there like you, paying attention to and acknowledging the real greatness in this world… like a couple unhurried seconds in the life of an anonymous woman in a red minivan.

On a good day it reinforces my world view… and on a bad day… it is… well… a spoonful of sugar

Since I read this earlier tonight I have been pondering things I could say to add to the story.  Bottom line, there aren’t any, so, without fanfare or preamble… here you go.

http://sports.espn.go.com/espnmag/story?section=magazine&id=3789373

Over the last month, largely because of my sisters urging which preceded an influx of family and then friend “pressure” (in the best sense of the word) I have been dragged (at first kicking and screaming, now just kicking… in more of a “love tap” sort of way) into the world of Facebook.

I have linked up with friends and family from around the country and to a lesser degree, the world, and as much as I hate to admit it, I have not hated it. However, what it has really done it serve as a reminder. Today I added a friend from Kansas, the first thing I did, of course, was to check out her profile. Here is her most recent update:

My Kiva family just made another payment on their loan. I’m really proud of them!

Her Kiva family! In case you are not familiar with http://www.kiva.org it is a service that allows individuals to give loans to other individuals in need. Specifically, entrepreneurs in developing countries around the world so that they can (to quote the website) “lift themselves out of poverty.”

Kiva is a great cause, and, I’m once again impressed and endeared to this particular friend; however, on a broader scale, I am reminded that you become what you surround yourself with and, I am probably on the path of becoming a pretty good person, based on the friends I have chosen over the past couple of years.

I have surrounded myself with some pretty spectacular people; people with amazing value systems and warm and giving hearts. I’m a very lucky person to have such friends and appreciative of my friend in Kansas for (inadvertently) reminding me of this.

That is all, over and out! J

Yesterday I spent the first half of the day sorting roughly 20,000 sticky notes (don’t worry I had lots of helpers, in the neighborhood of 100). Each sticky note contained a comment by a parent, staff member, or student of the Boise School District. The afternoon was spent turning the affinity groups created from that sorting into goals and goal supporting activities to be incorporated into the school districts strategic plan for now through 2015. In short I spent the day helping to set the direction for my children’s schools for the next 6 years.

It was an exciting, important, and, at times, trying experience. As usual, when people are passionate about what they believe in and meet people who are equally passionate about a different facet of the same system there was disagreement. For the most part, though, it was quite benign.

I have been through this process a couple of times now, twice for school district strategic planning and twice for mission, vision, and values work (essentially the same thing) in the business sector and it has stopped being a surprise to me that one of the rules that is always posted at the beginning of the process goes something like this “keep in mind that everyone is here for the same reason, to make _____ better.”

Many snickered when that rule was read… rookies!

It always becomes contentious, and people always forget this basic rule and need to be reminded. This is not because they are bad, or of low moral/ethical character. It is because they are passionate about what they are trying to accomplish. Passionate people are also emotional people, and emotions tend to blot out reason from time to time.

The process of strategic planning requires filtering and focusing. The objective is to boil out, define and focus upon the core tenants of the plan, and this means that some things, very important to some, will be left out of the plan (or at least appear to be, in reality very little is left out, but trusting the process can be difficult when it seems like your hot button issue is being relegated to the scrap heap). When this starts to happen, emotions begin to come to the surface… things get said.

Honestly, if I worked for an hour or two within this process with a group and there was not strong disagreement, I think I would probably leave. It is the passion that makes it worth it for me. It is knowing that I’m in a room with people so dedicated to what they believe in, that they are willing to go to the mat to fight for it.

At one point the principle of my oldest son’s Jr High offered (mostly in jest) to arm wrestle me over whether curriculum or communication should be on our final list of priorities (we didn’t, thank goodness, he would have crushed me!!). Eventually, when debate did not settle the issue, we simply took a vote (he crushed me afterall ).

Regardless of how this plan works out, and what material changes come from it, I know, for me, spending an entire day with that many focused, caring, and passionate teachers, administrators and parents has completely restocked my faith in the people behind the system.

For monetary and other reasons I don’t know if we will be able to accomplish everything we set out to do in that room yesterday, but I absolutely know that the hearts, minds and efforts of the Boise School District are in the right place with regards to the welfare of my children. And for that, I am very grateful.

It’s not often that I use the same vid clip for two different posts in one week. It’s even less often that I use one from a kids movie. But, I’d like you to consider the second portion of this clip:

After ignorning the “smile and wave” portion, we are left with the “well… this sucks” portion. For those of you who have not seen Madagascar, let me provide the background for you. Those diminutive penguins have plotted since the beginning of the movie to get to Antarctica. To get there, they wound up hijacking the ocean liner pictured in the clip and navigating it to their destination.

Getting to Antarctica was their sole mission in life. They were focused, disciplined and determined, and in being so accomplished their lifelong dream… escaping from captivity in a New York zoo and reaching their homeland of Antarctica. However, what we see in the above clip is what happens when you set your sights on something without being prepared for what happens when you get there.

For our President-elect, I do not predict a “Madagascar moment,” however for the some of the people that voted for him, that campaigned for him, that donated money and time to him… I fear this may be their reality.

Last night Obama won the election, but those of us who elected him have not won anything yet. This election is not analogous to winning, or even getting to, the World Series. It is more similar to making the playoffs. It is from this point that the real work begins. We are now in the game, but are we ready to play?

Making real change will require maintaining, if not increasing, the energy and enthusiasm invested in the election process. Where we once spent our time advocating our candidate, we must now advocate the policies of our President. We must remain involved; engage our politicians and our fellow citizens. We must now, as never before, be the change we want to see in the world.

The good news is, if we do… it will not suck

As I was driving around today I noticed several people who were noticeably upset about their fellow auto enthusiasts. I’m not sure if I am in a more grounded place because I have been dealing with my grandfathers turn for the worse, the funeral I attended this afternoon, or something else… but I found myself waxing about the phenomenon of frustration, mockery and even rage on the road.

In doing so I was reminded of a story one of my best friends from high school told me shortly after graduating from college. He and his college sweetheart had flown back (separately) to Boston so that he could meet her family. He was staying in a hotel a few miles from their home, had just checked in and was walking to the corner store for a snack and a magazine with which to pass the couple of hours he had until dinner.

As he began to cross the street, a car turning the corner far to fast nearly clipped him. Caught off guard and nearly scared out of his wits he reacted instantly and hit the back fender of the car with his hand, simultaneously, he encouraged the drive to slow down and look before turning corners in the future. Apparently offended by the young whipper snapper ‘s language and probably a bit emotionally charged up himself over thinking he had hit the youth, the driver indicated that my friend was number one with him as well.

A couple of hours later, as I’m sure you have pieced together by now, the two were formally introduced. Fortunately for everyone concerned, cooler heads prevailed (the father said the young man looked familiar, to which my friend replied “you do too, would you mind holding up your middle finger so I can be sure”) and it became an funny anecdote rather than the death knell of the young relationship.

I was also reminded of another story, this one from a larger context for which we all have some understanding. The date was September 11th, and the event… well today it bears the name of the date on which it occurred. As we watched the news coverage, there was a clip of a man hanging on to the outside of the building, needing a miracle to survive.

My friend and business partner (at the time) turned to me and said something to the effect of “the sad thing is, I keep thinking, those are real people, just like you and me. They have families, they have dreams, they have lives… just like us. The only real difference is that they happen to be working in the World Trade Center today.”

I do not mean to reduce the tragedy of 9/11 to the level of road rage, however the confluence of these two events is where my mind went. Because, the guy taking the corner a little too fast… is just an excited father, racing to get home to make sure everything is perfect for a dinner at which he is going to meet the man his one and only daughter might spend the rest of her life with. The woman who cuts you off in traffic might just be running late to pick up her 5 year old from a day care center that is closing in ten minutes. She’s not trying to beat you to that yellow light, she is trying to avoid putting someone at the day care in a compromised position.

The point, of course, is that other motorists are people too, just like you. They have lives, priorities, and distractions. None of them set out to upset you, head you off, of act like a complete idiot by missing that stop sign. Sometimes, life just happens to people.

Instead of being mad at them for it, how about giving them a smile and a wave to let them know you understand? Instead of saying “no way buddy, you’re not passing me on the right and getting in front of me” why not just ease back a little and let them in” As you ease off the gas and open up space, you will feel your tension level drop too, I promise. Random acts of kindness have been proven to be good for your health… and one or two fewer angry motorists are better for everyone’s health.

So next time you find yourself dealing with a irate or irresponsible driver, consider taking the advice of the penguins from children’s movie Madagascar… “Smile and wave boys, smile and wave”

I’d like to take a minute to recognize some people I know (or know of) that took part in what I view as a meaningful activity yesterday.  Each of these people took the time to dedicate their personal space, their blog to a common cause yesterday.  The cause was Blog Action Day 08 and the focus was poverty.

All of these blogs are on that topic.  Each providing an individual and varried view on the subject.  Please carve a couple of minutes out of your day and read through these blogs.  I’m certain it will be worth your time.  If you get really motivated to read more, each has a link to the “mother ship”, the Blog Action Day web site which contains entries from over 12,000 blogs… enough reading for the heartiest of appitites.

So, without further ado… my short list

http://givecheerfully.wordpress.com/2008/10/15/blog-action-day/#comment-23

http://dresramblings.com/2008/10/15/how-close-are-we-to-poverty/

http://devylgyrl.com/2008/10/15/blog-action-day-08-poverty/

http://www.on-a-limb.com/2008/10/15/turning-on-the-poor/

http://www.northsandiegobusiness.com/ethics/boosting-the-bottom-line-ethically/

http://www.wikyblog.com/CynthiaWunsch/Wednesday,_October_15,_2008

http://www.aimlessdirection.com/2008/hotel-poverty/

http://limetouch.com/archives/blog-action-day-2008-poverty/

Today is Blog Action Day: Poverty.  Bloggers around the world (at last count over 12,000 of them, are taking a moment out of their normal blogging lives to write about Poverty.  Whether raising awarenes, offering solutoins, or just lending a voice of support to the cause, this groundswell movement has momentum and has produced some great pieces.  You can check them out here: http://blogactionday.org/

The question, of course, is what, exactly am I going to talk about that 12,000 other bloggers have not already covered.  I thought about referencing a few of my previous blogs like this one How my son made me a better person this week…(http://puntiglio.com/blog/?p=187), but that seemed a bit like cheating… so I needed a different approach.

The low hanging fruit, of course was to pick on the economy, choose political sides and use this as a platform to advance my choice for president… again… not the best path.

Another option would be talking about various things I and other I know have done in the past, on an individual basis to combat poverty.  Things as simple as picking up the leftovers from conference dinners and taking them with us to distribute to the homeless in the streets of whatever city we might be visiting.  A nice inspiring but not overly prescriptive story, this actually seemed like a decent idea.

However, what I have chosen to do is challenge you.  What I’d like you to do is expend your own knowledge of the issue as it impacts you, in your community.  I’d like you to do a little research, and find out what the homeless and poverty rates in your area are.  Then find out what resources are available to those in your community who are in that unfortunate situation.

You don’t have to give to those organizations (you can if you feel so inclined) but that is not my challenge to you today.  I just want you to be informed.  Informed so that then next time poverty comes up in dinner, water cooler or locker room conversation you will be armed with both knowledge and potential solutions.

Here are some general poverty numbers for the US in 2007 (this data and more avaiable here: http://www.census.gov/hhes/www/poverty/poverty07/pov07hi.html):

* The official poverty rate in 2007 was 12.5 percent, not statistically different from 2006.
* In 2007, 37.3 million people were in poverty, up from 36.5 million in 2006.
* Poverty rates in 2007 were statistically unchanged for non-Hispanic Whites (8.2 percent), Blacks (24.5 percent), and Asians (10.2 percent) from 2006. The poverty rate increased for Hispanics (21.5 percent in 2007, up from 20.6 percent in 2006).
* The poverty rate in 2007 was lower than in 1959, the first year for which poverty estimates are available, while statistically higher than the most recent trough in 2000 (11.3 percent).
* The poverty rate increased for children under 18 years old (18.0 percent in 2007, up from 17.4 percent in 2006), while it remained statistically unchanged for people 18 to 64 years old (10.9 percent) and people 65 and over (9.7 percent).

This may not seem important to you, or like it will make a difference, but you will probably be amazed how often this topic comes up once you are attuned to it.

At any rate, that is my challange to you… your mission, should you choose to accept it.

This message will never self-destruct… at least as long as people like you continue to care…

I have some wonderfully giving friends, who do some wonderfully giving things.  Honestly, I’m a few points short of a perfect 10 on the wonderful scale, however I do try to keep up where I can.  I was talking to a friend about giving today and she was saying that as much as she would like to, she has trouble with charities (fears of where the money goes, feeling too detached, etc.) and did not really know, other than giving to food drives etc. what she might be able to do to make a difference in other peoples lives.

It probably goes without saying this turned out to be a lengthy and rewarding conversation.  As an offshoot of this, I’d like to share a few random things I have done recently toward making a difference in the lives of those around me.  What is nice about the items on this list is that there is no middle man, the impact is direct and there is no need for concern about detachment at all.

Everything on this list anyone can do for less than $50 (in some cases, significantly less).

Stamp out post office lines - I have actually done this one a few times in the past couple of months, simply because of the fantastic response it receives.  I go to the post office and purchase a roll (or a book depending on my budget) of forever stamps in the morning.  Then, at lunch, when the line is the longest, I go back and offer stamps to anyone in line just for stamps so that they do not have to wait in line.  It saves people time and a (very) little amount of money, and also reduces wait time for everyone else in line.  Everybody wins!

There is a such thing as a “free lunch” - I love to do this at lunch, I’ll walk around down town and poke my head into a random restaraunt, pick out a table and settle their bill with the hostess (without them knowing).  I seldom if ever see the reaction, but it does not take a lot of imagination to anticipate their pleasantly surprised faces as the news of their “free lunch.”

Buy a round for the whole… bus - I did this for the first time yesterday.  When I ride the bus home, I start at the genesis point of my route.  I made sure I got there early and purchased a $20 pass.  With it I paid for my fare, and then paid for the next 19 people who came on the bus as well.  In my case, I actually only paid for 12 people, as the bus was far from full and there wasn’t much point in paying for anyone who had a monthly pass.  So for $12 I paid for entire bus to ride home (or at least to their next connection).

Show some appreciation - When I lived in California and had to cross a toll bridge everyday for work I used really appreciate the people who spent their entire day in a little glass box collecting  bridge maintenance costs 75 cents at a time.  To show my appreciation to those toiling on the bridge, I would periodically include a small gift when paying my toll.  Nothing major, it could be anything from a mixed tape (I believe I may have just dated myself!) with music I knew they appreciated (yes, you can get to know bridge toll takers if you are willing to take the time to do so) to a snack basket.  Just a little something to let them know they are appreciated.

Busted!!! - I started doing this a few months back also.  When I have some spare cash, I purchase a few $10 gift cards from local convenience store/gas stations, and I keep them on me when I’m going about my life.  When I see someone doing something exemplary, especially if it is a selfless act for someone else, I give them a gift card.  Sort of my own little “I caught you doing something good” program.
This is the most enjoyable part of my budget, I absolutely love trying to figure out little things I can do that will make a difference to someone else.  My hope, long term, is that some of these stories will be exchanged at dinner tables, break rooms, or coffee shops and inspire others to do similar things.  I figure if, at a grassroots level, people start taking care of one another, perhaps a fundamental culture change will grow from that which will effect real, substantive change in our world.

At that point I could walk happily into the sunset whispering “my work is done here…”

By Tomorrow, Congress will decide if they intend to extend or let expire (at the end of 2008) the clean air tax credits (AKA Production Tax Credit or PTC). The PTC is a per-kilowatt-hour tax credit for electricity generated by qualified energy resources. It gets adjusted for inflation, but it is in the area of 2 cents per kWh (currently 2.1). The credit can be taken for the first 10 years of production, so, in essence, it is a financial boost to get renewable energy facilities up and running, but not a indefinite tax benefit.  This is a bi-partisan bill that made it easily through the Senate with support from both sides of the isle.

Since the process of extending the PTC began it has been allowed to expire three times. Each time with a significant reduction in new installations (for wind alone: 2000 - 93% drop in installation; 2002 - 73%; 2004 - 77%; estimates for 2009 if the PTC is not extended are in the area of 90%).

What does this mean, financially? The raw numbers (as calculated by Navagant Consulting in February of this year) are 116,000 jobs and $19 Billion in clean energy investment between wind and solar for the year 2009. Of course, just like the interest in your savings account, these numbers grow exponentially over the years due to the lost year (or more) of “principle investment.”

Our country is currently overly dependent on foreign energy supplies. This one of the major issues of our current presidential elections, and an ugly shadow that looms over our society as a whole. We have fought wars over oil and, so long as our dependency is in place, will have commitments to foreign nations that handcuff our ability to conduct business and form foreign policy freely and without restriction.

Our world is currently feeling the effects of global warming. Regardless of whether you think it is a mostly man made phenomenon or is a natural cycle that we are only magnifying with our green house gas emissions; there is no dispute over the fact that our current energy practices are having a measurable effect on the environment.

Renewable energy sources like wind and solar can dramatically reduce both foreign energy dependence and green house gas emissions. Both are completely renewable, and freely available within our own borders. The new wind installations in 2007 alone (which, by the way, represented 35% of the nations new electrical capacity for that year) provide enough energy to power the equivalent of 1.5 millions U.S. homes.

This is a growing, thriving industry, with the potential to not only power our homes, but prevent us from continuing to be beholden to nations who do not share our beliefs and ideologies while simultaneously helping to ensure a stable environmental future for our children and grand-children.

Its hard to imagine the downside to extending the PTC, however, the numbers are very clear about the dangers of allowing it to expire; increased unemployment rates, and an economy further dragged down by stunted investment.

So what can you do? You can write your Legislators and tell them how important the PTC extension is to you and your country. It will only take a minute, because you can go to this site (http://capwiz.com/windenergy/home) Enter your zip code and send a letter to all of your federal elected officials at once. Even better, I have acquired a sample letter (below). You can copy and paste it into the box, use portions of it in a letter of your own creation, or, of course, ignore it and simply do your own thing.

Whatever avenue you choose, however, please write them today. The time to act is now, tomorrow will, literally, be too late.

Sample letter:

Dear Congressperson,

I am writing to urge your affirmative vote in the passage of H.R. 6049, The Renewable Energy and Job Creation Act of 2008.  This bi-partisan bill allows for the continued growth of renewable energy in the U.S. and clears a path for a cleaner, energy independent future. The Senate overwhelmingly passed this resolution and now it’s up to the House to relay the message to renewable energy industries and the world that we want clean energy, green jobs and thriving rural economies.

Without the extension of the Production Tax Credit for renewable energy, development and construction will come to a halt. This not only hurts industry, but it also increases our dependence on greenhouse gas emitting energy sources and foreign fuel. As our appetite for energy grows, so must our dedication to clean, secure energy sources.

In addition, the renewable energy industry benefits the American economy by creating jobs in manufacturing, construction and engineering. Local taxes invigorate rural economies already struggling to stay afloat. Farmers and ranchers receive royalty payments on their land, while still engaging in their livelihoods. In these tumultuous times, renewable energy is a constant; energy does not fluctuate in cost due to volatile fuel prices.

Please, take the time to speak with your fellow Representatives in support of H.R. 6049. The people want renewable energy, and this is your chance to see that we receive it.

Sincerely,

As I look through the history of the date September 11th I am besieged with violence.  The first full Army unit landed in Viet Nam, Mormon “guerillas” killed 120 unarmed settlers, a group of socialists tried to effect peace… by starting revolutions and civil wars, and, of course, the terrorist airplane attacks of 2001.  The list goes on, I’m stopping there.

The effect goes on as well. As a result of the events of 2001, we still have troops on the field of battle in two middle eastern nations.  Young Americans are tearing apart, and in some cases giving up, their lives for the belief that they can make a difference in how much the future does or does not reflect the violent past.

Earlier today, an online friend pointed out that he was a volunteer at ground zero in 2001, and that he can still remember that burning smell.  He made the point that he did not need to be reminded “how important it was to remember”…  that he would, in fact, never forget.  What concerns me, what I would like to change, is what, in particular, some people are electing to remember.

I have written before about my affinity for Mothers day (in the traditional sense).  About how the holiday was created out of a desire for peace and an end to war.  It was not about placing blame, it was not about extolling the virtues of one ideology over another it was about a group of people coming together to celebrate whatever efforts could be made to prevent the horrors of war from happening again, to prevent losing more of their sons to the wanton violence of war.

Obviously, that movement has fallen prey to the retail movement and today Mothers Day is more about gifts, flowers and brunch.  However, I think there are some strong and necessary roots in the original movement.  Things that, when we take the time to “never forget” we should keep in the forefront of our minds.

What I would encourage you to do today, rather than remembering the horrors, the enemy, and the mission; is to focus some energy on making sure it does not happen again.  Do you really understand why the Vietnam war took place, why a group of Mormons would be moved to trick settlers out of their guns and then kill them, why a group of socialists seeking peace would call for civil war, and, of course, why a someone would fly an airplane into a building?  If so, what can you do, what can anyone do, to make sure it does not happen again?

Thousands of years of violence have proven that you cannot shoot your way to peace.  In fact, almost every “conquered” nation in history has come back later to be a nation that repressed others in its own way.  The cycle of violence, revenge, and repression does not work.

On this day, when most of the nation will have the tragedy of September 11th on their minds, I ask you to think carefully about what you choose remember.  Make it constructive and compassionate.

Remember how, as a nation, and as a people, we are generous… and give.

Remember how, as a nation, and as a people, we are peaceful… and make a stand for to end the wars.

Remember how, as a nation, and as a people, we are tolerant… and work to better understand what other people are experiencing.

Remember how, as a nation, and as a people, we have abundance… and share.

Remember that we are supposed to be the good guys.  We are supposed to set an example.  If you were given the opportunity to write the history book that children were studying in the year 3000, how would you write the chapter on the years you were alive?  What would we accomplish in that era?

Today, when you hear the words “always remember” or “never forget”, will your subsequent thoughts support the history you want to create for your generation?

Perhaps, with the right frame of mind, we can change the nature of the history of September 11th, and that is something noone would ever forget..

Forty-five years ago, today, MLK gave his famous “I have a dream” speech.  It has become an anthem, as well it should have.  With advanced apologies to the specific demographic for which it was intended, I intend to co-opt it into my “cause.”

Much more recently a good friend of mine, while explaining why she was supporting Obama for President instead of Clinton, made the argument that she, as a feminist, was doing so because he was the candidate that most closely represented the feminist idea.  This friend, by the way, really is an expert on the topic; as in, she has a graduate degree in the field of Women’s and Gender Studies.  She explained it this way:

Feminism is not about gender.  It is not limited in scope to sex.  Feminism is about a perspective, it is about hearing those marginalized based on race, gender, class, and sexual orientation.  It is about moving away from a place of privilege to a place of lived experience, and it is about a politics of transformation - of action not reaction.

I typically refer to this behavior as “living”, rather than feminism; however, I’ll take any port (word) in a storm.  The concept is wonderful and the explanation perfect.  Further, as I think about it, the underlying traits of compassion, good will, and fairness are far more often (not uniquely, but more often) found in women than in men, so perhaps feminism is not such a poor moniker.

So, now, we come to my dream.  It is my hope that in my lifetime, or, of that is too optimistic, in my children’s lifetimes, that there will come a day where everyone looks at others as equals.  Where compassion rules over compulsion, benevolence over bigotry, and empathy over apathy.

I dream of a society that values each and every asset present within it equally.  One where people will be judged and treated according to nothing more (and nothing less) than “the content of their character.”

My dream continues with people realizing that they do not need to have an individual cause, but rather can be part of a greater human cause.  In the area of human interaction, there should not be minorities, majorities and demographics; there should simply be humans, interacting.  My dream is that all crusaders for equal rights realize they are fighting for the same things.  I want to see more people like my friend, who are willing to put an ideal ahead of an agenda.  Perhaps what I want, is a nation of feminists.

That is my dream, on this important anniversary, what is yours?

PS Thank you again Dr King, your words and life continue to be an inspiration to an ever increasing number.

Just yesterday I was debating the use of the word “gay” to describe something bad.  As part of my argument about the ignorance that helps perpetuates this type of thing, I related the story of having to insist that my father stop saying “mighty white of you” to describe someone doing a good deed for someone else.

Innocence or ignorance allow us to do and say things that are harmful and that encourage people to continue their bigoted and oppressive ways.  Every time a person laughs at a joke with a clearly racial, sexist, or otherwise targeted punch line, they are giving their blessing for others to continue to treat that group as inferior.  And it is that mind set that other groups are inferior, or sub-humans that allow people to oppress them with a clear conscience.

This morning I shouted out “sweet redemption” when I found out that I had been given a reprieve on having to register my son at school today (admittedly a bit of an over-reaction).  Imagine my surprise when I discovered that phrase has racial undertones!

The phrase “sweet redemption” comes from the south.  This. you may have expected, or figured out on your own.  What you may not have known (I didn’t) is that what it referred to, in the 1870’s, was a southern state that had managed to throw off its post civil war northern influence and entered a period of white supremacy, known, specifically as “redemption”.  This term was so widely used in the south during that period that the all-white Democratic government administrations were called “Redeemer” governments.

Looking further into this I discovered that on this date (August 12th) in 1876 the political cartoon below was published in Harpers Weekly.  The caption reads: Declaration of Equality.  Justice “five more wanted.”  The cartoon refers to a riot in that took place in Hamburg, South Carolina as the local powers were trying to created their own Redeemer government (more info on the cartoon here).

This word, redemption, did not start off with negative meaning, of course.  I would go further to suggest that today it has shaken off those prejudicial roots and reclaimed its proper meaning.  In the same way I think “gay” “retarded” and other such words do not need to maintain their current connotatively negative meanings.  All it takes is some education and some discipline.

Teach your children that gay is not an insult, it means either homosexual or happy.  I had a 16 year old tell me that he had never even considered the fact that anyone would be upset at his use of the term “gay” to describe something that is stupid, bad or inferior.  Point out to your friends who say something is retarded that, they are insulting a segment of the population that, realistically, could be very real and very close to them very soon.  What if their son or daughter was born with Down Syndrome, how would they then feel about the use of the term.  Using a word that represents an entire demographic as a put down fosters ignorance and intolerance.  Please… think before using them this way.

I have this goofy dream that in a generation or two, with just a modicum of effort, words that are being “misused” today can be reclaimed, just like others have…

And that would be a sweet redemption indeed…

Years ago I was sitting in the office of my company’s CEO one night (we were both there late, and when I noticed her in the office, I stopped by to say hello) just sort of shooting the breeze. While we were chatting, she said something that, on the surface, should have been obvious. However, for whatever reason, it really resonated with me, and has stuck with me until this day.

We were talking about her habit of picking up trash in the parking lot (not your typical CEO’s afternoon activity). The way she explained it to me was this:

It is not reasonable to expect my employees or customers to care if I don’t care myself. If I walk past a piece of trash in the parking lot and do not pick it up, I might as well have thrown it there myself.

I think part of the reason this conversation has stuck with me for so long is that I tend to apply that way of thinking to the world in general. The old saying “if you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem” is true. It is convenient to think that just because you are not actively contributing to the problem, you are not responsible for its existence. However, this is simply not true. By simply taking the path of least resistance (or greater enjoyment) rather than making the “right” or “best” choice, we are contributing, or at least enabling.

We complain about violence in movies and video games, and yet support a whole culture based on glorifying this violence. We listen to (and let our children listen to) songs like this (which fosters violence, revenge and mindless retaliation):

Instead of songs like this (one of my favorite songs ever) which promotes forgiveness, understanding and a constructive approach to ones future:

We listen to raps like this which extols the “virtues” of womanizing and violence:

Instead of instructive, awareness generating raps like this;

As you can see, you can still tell the story of the ghetto life, without glorifying the violence.

But we continue to make these choices. I was told the other day, in defense of “Before he cheats”, that it is “just a song.” I’m sorry but, catchy and hard to turn off though it may be, it is not just a song; it is an anthem for a big part of what is wrong with our society. When you listen to, speak positively of or sing this song in public, you are giving your implied consent and blessing to the actions taken in the song. Would you really raise your daughter to take a baseball bat and set of keys to the truck of an ex? Would you, by the same token, encourage her to pull the hair out of an offending classmates head for hitting her at school? Any eye for an eye make’s the whole world blind, my friends.

This piece is not about music. It is about everything in our day to day lives. How often do you really look at the actions you are taking, and the statements you are making by in doing so?

We are all stewards of our planet, our countries, our communities and our own personal lives. As I walk through the parking lot of my life, I try to pick up the trash and throw it away (or even better… recycle it), rather than simply walking by and pretending I don’t see it. How about you?

All I ever needed to know about life, I learned from my mother.

This is not to say that everything I know came from her, but there were key life lessons that she made sure I understood at an early age. My son asked me the other day for a “primer” on being a good person. What he would have to do, other than the basics of going to work and being respectful, kind and thoughtful. After acknowledging that he had a pretty good start with that list, I decided to give him a little list of quotes my mother shared with me growing up (no, “I’m going to make you life a living hell” is not on the list). Now, I’m going to share it with you.

What you think of me is none of my business - This is a lesson I learned early in life. At the end of the day, the only person anyone has to answer to is themselves (and, perhaps their spiritual inspiration, if they are so inclined). Noone else matters. Further, there is little positive effect that can be gained by focusing on what other people think about you. While there is some small benefit in re-enforcing your positive view of yourself, once you go down this road, you open the door to being externally motivated, and from that point on anything, good or bad, can waltz right in. You are far better served by having your self-worth set by none other than yourself.

Leave it better than you found it - The “it” in question can be anything. From your bedroom or the kitchen to the country or even the world. This is a simple guideline to every interaction you have in life, regardless of size. It is within each of us to do this. It really does not take that much effort, just bend over and pick up some litter while walking back to your car from a day in the park, or take a moment to talk to a person who is obviously having a bad day. You would be surprised how little effort it takes to make a visible and measurable difference in the world.

Hope is not a strategy - Take the time to know what you want to do, and why. By no means should you live a structured, controlled and boring life. As outlined below, you must, at times, throw caution to the wind and just go for it. However, that should always be part of a bigger plan or purpose. Have something that guides you through life. It can be as simple as a mantra, or as complicated as wanting to eradicate world hunger, and it can change so long as it is there.

If you’re walking on thin ice, you might as well dance - No, this is not carte blanch for reckless and irresponsible behavior, however, there is something to be said for getting the car out of third or fourth gear and leaving a little rubber on the road of life. The best stories in the world are the ones you have experienced yourself. Live it up, take some chances, and create great realities. Take the road less traveled, but don’t expect that to make the difference. Take initiative and you, yourself, will be the difference.

If all of your friends were going to jump off a cliff, would you do that too - so much of the worlds “institutional knowledge” is based on ignorance, bigotry and fear that it makes the extraordinary popular delusions somewhat palatable. However, neither, of course, passes for actual truth. Basing your actions or opinions on those of the masses or the majority, while sometimes fine, is often simply wrong. Never let yourself just “go with the flow” of public opinion, be sure to know what the facts are and make up your own mind.

Then, if cliff jumping looks fun… dive in… or should I say… dance!!

I got a great suggestion today. Simply put it was “inspire other people to do good things.” We talked a bit more about how this might be done. We discussed, for example, the pros and cons of “bribery” when it comes to doing things that better the world. In the end, we decided that a little reward never hurt anyone. In fact most things come with rewards, just because they are not financial, does not change the motivating force that they are.

So… I’m going to bribe you

First the reward. $50 Amazon gift certificates, two of them (unless someone else donates more

The first winner will be drawn from the first 10 people to complete the “challenge.” The second will be more subjective, a random draw from what I believe to be the best 5 entries/suggestions. So, yes, one person *could* win both, if they were both fast and brilliant.

Entries can be submitted to me via twitter or by comment here on the blog (bonus points for anyone who does both). I will acknowledge every entry, so if you do not hear back from me, follow up!

Here is the “challenge.” Use your “voice” to publically advocate, suggest, or implement some kind of positive movement/change/idea. This can come in a variety of forms. You could promote a charitable cause, plan an event, publish detailed(ish) instructions on how to hold an event (empowering others to do so), advocate a cause in a proactive and forward moving way (complaints will not be considered). The method of delivery is flexible as well, provided it is something that can be shared, spread, etc. For example, you could write a blog, issue an utterz, create a video and post on youtube, etc. Any form of public expression is acceptable, I just have to be able to go see/hear/etc. it after you submit it.

I will probably be compiling all of these into some sort of coherent mashup’y thing, so please do not submit anything you do not want packaged and shared. No, in case you are wondering, I will not be making any money off of any of this… I may post a donation link to some international cause, but that will be the only money exchanging hands related to this project. I will post links to all of the entries once the contest is complete.

So that’s it. Write, speak, record your ideas for making the world a better place. Send me a link to your notions and sit back and wait to see if you are $50 amazon dollars richer for your efforts.

Okay okay… first of all… I could publish these more regularly… this is true

I think some people are getting tired of me asking. Today on Twitter, I only received one response, even though I have over 100 more followers than the first time I asked. However, the response I got was a good one!

Show Gratitude daily / random acts of kindness / share a smile with someone whether they deserve it or not / reach out to others

princess_belle, I like where your heads at!!

It was suggested, a few days ago, that I write a piece extolling the virtues of the police, something that really is lacking in the press. I am going to do so, just not sure when, but I think there is good value in this piece… so watch for it

One of my co-workers suggested looking for people who appeared down and lonely and befriending them. Due to time constraints I am not the best person for this job, however I have spent several lunches lately walking around and engaging people (who match this description) in conversation. By that, largely I mean, I start talking to them, and then let them do most of the talking. I think (and it seems to be working) that most people who are in this state probably needs someone to listen to and validate them, more than they just need someone talking to them.

A great suggestion was to “rekindle the spirit of community in business.” I really liked this idea because, of course, I’m such a fan of the community aspects of the current incarnation of the web. Toward this end I did a series of free consultations over the past week for friends in business looking to improve their brands etc. Interestingly I probably learned as much as they did. It turns out that when someone is not paying you for a consultation, they are quite a bit more liberal with their ideas and creativity.

I’m looking forward to more suggestions, please keep them coming!!!

For the past couple of weeks, in a variety of venues, I have started my day by telling people I am working on ways to improve the world and asking if they had any suggestions. The variety of the answers has been remarkable. It probably goes without saying that I have not been able to honor every request (especially ones put out to social media sites), but it has been fun reading, listening and implementing (some of) them. I think I will continue this practice for a while and from time to time write about a few of the requests and how they went. Please feel free to comment if you have any suggestions!

Here are a couple of the suggestions thus far:

From Twitter I received the request to “perhaps you could assault religion as the evil it is?” I was not able to completely comply on this one (I have issues with a lot of organized religion stands for and does, but not religion as a whole). But, I did produce this blog

Is that blog going to change the world, no. But, if it makes a couple of people think, and opens their minds a bit… that could be the start of a positive transformation. I’ll settle for that

Via email I received the following request: “Work on shifting the daily negativity in our society toward positivity”. After responding “that will never work ;)” I got busy!!! The first thing I did was rekindle my own interest in a project that was supposed to get off the ground a month ago, with any luck it will be rolling within the next couple of weeks. Here is a teaser from the “about” page:

Many people think of gratitude as something that comes at the end of a process. Sort of an “end of the day” emotion. Certainly there are elements in our societal training that condition us to believe that we need something to be grateful for, in order to be grateful. What we would like to suggest to you is that gratitude is the fertile soil from which accomplishment blooms. Gratitude is, in fact, the “beginning of the day”.

I then launched Operation Constant Compliment ™ my own personal challenge to myself to extend no less than one compliment per hour that I am awake every day. So far I am well ahead of the curve, and it feels fantastic!!!! Look for more on this effort soon

Last Tuesday morning, I stopped at a light by a man with a card board sign (I’m sure you can imagine the rest of the picture). I thought he might have some insight, so involved him in my process. His response surprised me:

“If you want to make the world a better place, you’d better not give me money. However, you should give me a ride, and be prepared to spend a little.”

This was interesting enough for me to take him up on his (rather cryptic) suggestion. He hopped in, and we headed out. We went exactly one block and he said turn left, so I did, in to the Albertson’s parking lot. He then marched me up to the customer service counter and instructed them that we needed a gift certificate in the amount of… At this point he looked at me for a number, and I replied (somewhat to my own surprise) $100. I had just had a very good night playing poker and was already of the mind that I should share some of my good fortune, however I did not anticipate donating that large a sum of money, especially since at this point I was not exactly sure where the money was even going to go. From there we hopped back into the truck and headed out. He navigated me to a shelter in downtown Boise and asked if I had a problem with him making the donation. A request I quickly concented to. About five minutes later he came back to the car, and offered me the receipt, so I would know he had actually given it to the shelter, I declined. I took him to breakfast, dropped him off and headed back to work.

Did this make the world better… I’m not sure. But I’m sure it had to have had a positive effect on the volunteers at that particular shelter, seeing one of their “patrons” giving back when he had the chance. I know it gave me an infusion of hope.

I think that is enough for today, you get the idea. Again, please share any ideas you have… I’m wide open to suggestion and excited, dedicated and motivated to do as much as I can!!!