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September 29, 2009

I’m watching for the bedroom scenes…

Filed under: Observations — sbj @ 5:28 am

Tonight I watched Flash Forward.  It was a pretty decent show, with an interesting concept and I think I could easily be entertained for a season or so (not unlike 24 hooked me for a year).  The acting was okay, the characters were alright, and the sub-plots are going to be at least moderately interesting.

However, until toward the end, it was absolutely a coin toss whether this show was going to be able to garner my attention for more than a week or two… and then it happened.  One of the best scenes I have seen in years.. When I least expected it, no less.

It was innocent enough, and I think might have flew right on by a lot of people, however if you saw it, I’m referring to the scene in bed where the main character and his wife exchange the stories of their flash forwards (visions into the future, for those who have not seen the show).

Before I go on, if you are interested and want to see it, it is on hulu (hulu.com), or I’m sure the network has it on their web site as well.  After this paragraph, there will be some light spoilers, so stop here if you don’t want to see them.

She asks him what he saw, and he, in typical male fashion, tells her all of the parts that are not likely to get him in trouble, omitting the part where he is drinking, which he knows will set her off.  He answers promptly, leaving room for her to believe she has the full story.

He then asks her, and she does her best to not answer, saying it is too painful to share.  Finally poked and prodded into responding she tells him the whole truth of her vision.  Which was her, with another mad.  She even goes on to say that in her vision she has very strong feelings and desires for this other man.

It was a fascinating, and candid look into how people typically act in my experience.  Often guys seem to be the ones who are putting things out there, but it is always measured, often omitting things that might upset the other person or get them in trouble.  Women will try to protect, or fix, but ultimately will be complete and honest in their responses.

It gut wrenching to ME as a member of the audience to think about how difficult it must have been for her to say what she said to him, especially the part about her feelings toward the other man.  And yet, she did… women, typically, do.

There are, of course, questions of conditioning.  Perhaps men simply lack the courage women have in telling the truth.  Perhaps men believe (rightly or wrongly) that women do not have the “forgive and forget” reflex of men and are afraid to say something because they know (feel) that it will be catastrophic.

Perhaps both of these things are true, or perhaps something altogether different is the case.  And that is what was great about this scene, it opens up all of the possibilities.  I could write for days about this simple interaction (and thats not even getting into the subsequent reactions of the characters.

But instead I’ll leave you with that, and the URL to the show, and you can watch and decide for yourself (or not).  As for myself, that scene in and of itself was enough for me to go back and watch at least a few more episodes.  After all, its not every day that an action/drama tv show inspires this much thought, especially with a bedroom scene!

September 25, 2009

What matters, anyway…

Filed under: Just life,Observations — sbj @ 4:58 pm

Throughout the course of my life, I have wondered what is supposed to matter and what isn’t in a relationship.  I don’t mean “am I in love” or “is the sex good” or “are we happy and do we laugh” etc.  I know all of those things and I know their importance.

No, I mean… does it matter if we roll or squeeze the toothpaste, does it matter if we like earth tones or bright splashy colors, if we eat mostly veggies, or mostly meat, etc.

I’ve been told by many to do my homework before I commit to a relationship; that I should know the little things that are going to drive me batty before I jumping into something that I will later want to back out of because, really, who can reasonably be expected to stay together with someone who can’t even put the toilet paper on the roll properly (for the record is **MUST** roll over the top to the front, not languish at the back!).

For a long time this seemed very important and prudent to me.  But lately I’ve done some reflecting… and some second guessing.

I like earth tones, they are soothing to me, easy on my eyes and they make accent pieces really stand out… which I love.  However, ultimately, they are just shades and background… and I can live without them just fine, if something else brings joy to the person who brings me life.

I like “messy” landscaping, it pleases me to no end to have a little wilderness in my yard, it makes me feel more like I am “away from it all”… which I love.  However, ultimately, it is just groundcover and vegetation and I can live without it just fine, if something else brings joy to the person who brings me life.

I like hip hop music, the rhythm, bass and infectious beat just makes my body want to move, I love to dance and nothing brings the movement out of me like an upbeat R&B song.  However, ultimately, it is just a soundtrack, a highlight to the real substance of life, and I can live without it just fine, if something else brings joy to the person who brings me life.

Ultimately, I guess, what matters the most, are the things that don’t matter…

… that, and the toilet paper!

September 24, 2009

Thank you Google…

Filed under: Observations — sbj @ 4:15 pm

I would “booo” gmail’s recent issues (down for a day, contacts are down today, etc.), but after so many years of fantastic free service, I’m opting for patience and understanding…

Which has me thinking. If I can elect to have this approach with them, perhaps I can learn to have this approach with everyone, whether they have provided years of meritorious service or if five minutes of annoyance is my only experience with them. After all, I’ve always said the quality of a persons character can be found not only in their actions, but equally in their reactions to their circumstances…

So, thanks gmail, for breaking, and reminding me about one of my core beliefs, and in turn, probably, making me a better person…

September 14, 2009

Class…

Filed under: Cool stuff,Music,Observations — sbj @ 3:18 pm

Right off the bat I want to be clear.  I am not writing a post about Kanye West, and his input in the first video.  You can make up you rown mind on his actions and do not need my thoughts to do so.  However, I am providing the video as background for what comes next.

What came next, in case you missed the VMA awards was a fantastic (in my opinion) show of class by a woman who I (usually) do not give a lot of credit too. Beyonce is not my favorite artist (she is not my least favorite or anything, she just doesn’t do for me what an India Arie does, for example). However, I cannot say enough about how she handled the fall out from the clip above. In fact, I’m not going to try to say anything about it… I’m just going to roll the tape…

That is roll model material… props, Beyonce… eom.

September 11, 2009

What We Remember…

Filed under: Uncategorized — sbj @ 3:34 pm

I remember the first time I saw you, how I had to double take to be
sure my eyes had not deceived me…

I remember craving even the most accidental touch of your skin…

I remember wanting nothing in the world, in fact not even acknowledging that anything else in the world even existed until I could kiss you…

I remember not wanting to let go of our first hug…ever…

I remember saying rushed good nights too you, so that I could fall
asleep faster and be with you again tomorrow…

I remember structuring my entire day around the possibility of
catching a the slightest glimpse of you…

I also remember forgetting all of this…

- I never want to remember that again…

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