April 29, 2010

Hugo Reyes, I blame you!!!

Filed under: Just life — Tags: , , , — sbj @ 6:48 pm

Hugo Reyes, AKA Hurley, you are the season of my discontent!  A couple of years ago now I gave up tv.  Not just cable tv, all of it.  When the digital requirements came in, the last vestiges of tv in the Jacobsen house went out.

For years I had avoided the temptation that was Lost, all of my friends said I would love it, I said no!  I’m not doing tv anymore… period.  Then along came netflix and one somewhat bored evening.

I thought it would be quick and easy.  Watch an episode, maybe two, realize the fuss was about nothing more than the usual mindless tv drivel and I’d be happily back in no tv land.


You see… there was Hurley.  I have no idea why his character captured me so much, but, while everyone else was pining over Jack, Kate, Sawyer, etc. I couldn’t get enough of Hurley… and so I was stuck.

Actually, I do have some idea… Hurley is the visualization of the dream I had as a child.  Become rich, and do it in such a way that even if you tell people about it they don’t believe you.  It’s not just the clothes, down to earth casual guy next door attire is a good start, but, it’s the personality.

He cares about the same things you and I do, for apparently the same reasons. He’s an absolutely normal guy… with $150 million (give or take a few… who’s counting at that point).  He is exceptional, not because of his wealth, but more so in spite of it.  He shines because of his compassion and his ability to relate to the human condition.

So, over the past two or three months I have managed to catch up, watching every single episode of this infernal show to the point where I now have to wait a week like everyone else to see what happens next.  And the sad thing is, its not even great tv.  It’s okay, but its not fantastic.  It’s not changing my life, or even improving it.

Nope, the simple truth is that I’ve bonded with Hugo, and I need to know what happens to him.  I’ve bonded to the point that I am already a bit bitter about the yet to be seen ending of the final season… what then.  I am a 43 year old man who has never before cared enough about a tv show to not want it to end.

And now, I’m feeling it, and it’s pissing me off!!!

I’ve developed my own theory (I’m certain I’m the only one who’s done that, right?) As to what is going on with the island.  Gradually as all of the inhabitants are eliminated, they find that they have jumped in time and space yet again… to another CBS prime time tv show!  I am certain that in the last episode Charlie will return to the island only long enough to announce that “on October 6th, the planet blacked out for two minutes and 17 seconds, the whole world saw the future.”

Do you see what has become of my addled brain… and it’s all Hugo’s fault… all of it!

April 26, 2010

Mea Culpa?

Filed under: Observations — Tags: , , , , — sbj @ 5:09 pm

Friday night, at the local watering hole, I found myself in a conversation with three women of varying feminist proclivities, regarding the role of a historically anglo-patriarchal society in shaping todays culture and equality environment (come on, it’s the same stuff you talk about when you get a drink after work on a Friday night, admit it! ;) ).

Part of the discussion involved white men admitting that they had been “jerks” for several hundred years. There was general disagreement, in fact bewilderment might be the better word, on the part of some of the women in the conversation as to why “we” couldn’t just say “yeah, that happened, it sucked, now lets move on.” My response was along the lines of this:

Because (white) men are scared (not individually, but as a group). If we admit we oppressed women (or blacks, or native americans, or anyone else for that matter) we are on the hook for it. We are responsible, and that doesn’t work for two reasons. 1) it puts at risk our position at the top of the “food chain,” our entire society is set up to favor white men, if we have to make up for centuries of favoritism (longer, in the case of women) in the form of reparations, that is going to change. 2) even if (as was suggested by my drinking companions) the women (or other groups) were willing to say “bygones, thanks for owning your mistake,” no one wants a tarnished history. Everyone wants to be the good guy in the story… tough shoes to fill with 400 years (or more, depending on which group you are focused upon) of oppression on our back.

Well, little did I know that we were in such good company. For, also on Friday, no less August a source than the New York Times ran an oped about the slave trade, culpability, and reparations. The article is here: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/23/opinion/23gates.html?scp=1&sq=slavery%20blame&st=cse

I didn’t see the actual article (until today), however while reading the Times on my way to work (on the bus, don’t worry, I don’t read and drive!), I stumbled across three letters to the editor about it (here: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/26/opinion/l26slavery.html). The article, and all of the letters are written by respected college professors and none are the type of whiny drivel you might find in some letters to the editor section, they are all well worth the read.

Clearly, reparations are still an issue, and, I believe, a big part of the reason that those who might be otherwise inclined to give a communal “my bad” are keeping their heads buried. No one wants to be punished for something they didn’t do, and it is fairly safe to say (except for a couple of yahoo’s here and there) that the folks that would have to admit to wrong doing today, are not guilty of the wrong doing in question (don’t get me started about any wrong doing that is takig place today… this piece is long enough already).

Over the course of my life the demographic breakdown of my friends clearly indicates that I am neither bigoted nor sexist. In this very blog I have championed equal rights in both popular and … lets say… less popular ways. Clearly (at least I like to think) I am not the bad guy here.

However… while I did not commit the crimes, that does not mean I am not enjoying the fruits of that unsavory labor. I am a healthy, tall, white male… as far as “advantages”, it doesn’t get much better than that.

Using only the history of this particular parcel of land (the United States) dating back to early colonial times, “I” have been a respected, participating, and in every measurable way a real part of society since day one (lets call that 1492), or, roughly 520 years.

Women got the right to vote (which should not be confused with full equality) in 1920 (or, roughly 90 years ago). *If* voting right translated to equal rights (they don’t) that would mean that men had a 430 year head start in shaping the country the way they wanted it. (Lest you think that the US is too back woods and behind the rest of the world, Finland was the first country to give full suffrage to women, in 1906).

Discrimination by race is only moderately better (15th amendment – 1870), or moderately worse (MLK was assissinated only 40 short years ago) than that of gender, depending on your perspective

Obviously, the dates on which groups received the vote do not equate to equal footing in creating our national culture. However, even if we (generously) grant those dates as being the watershed moments for those groups, That would mean that men of a race other than white have been involved for what would amount to 26% (the 4th quarter of a basketball game), and women (regardless of race) 17% (entering a metaphorical baseball game in the bottom of the eighth inning).

As talented as Mr. Jordan (Mr. Bird, or Wilt the Stilt) was, I don’t think he would make a very big impression on the game playing only the fourth quarter. Similarly, as talented as Mr. Ruth (or Mr Cobb, or A-Rod) was, playing less than the last two innings, the game would likely be decided well before his involvement. Clearly there is an advantage to the guys who play the whole game.

Perhaps this is what we need to recognize. Perhaps people like me need to stand up and rather than saying I’m sorry I caused the hardships your forefathers experienced (which I didn’t); we need to say, I recognize that I am enjoying benefits from a history that was greatly tilted in my favor (which I am), I feel compassion for your position (which I do), and where I can, I’m here to help.

Recently I said, to a very dear friend, “I’m not dealing in fault… it is a fleeting and temporary placebo for action and accountability.” I believe that applies here as much as it might anywhere else. I’m not sure about reparations. I don’t know that they are feasible/practical, nor do I know if I think they are that right course of action if they are. But I do know about action and accountability. I am perfectly capable of acknowledging my advantages, and taking whatever actions I can to level the playing field.

This feels like a good start…

April 2, 2010

You could do far worse things with just over an hour…

Filed under: A life worth living,Make the world better,Observations — Tags: , — sbj @ 3:58 am

So, here’s the deal.  What started out as a seed for a simple blog entry has turned into more of a project.  Some time ago I solicited my socnet for input and help in creating a playlist that a person might play to their daughters; hoping that they would get the right messages from the songs and the play list could help shape them while it entertained them.

The Youtube playlist below is the result of that solicitation.

Today as I was mastering (which, soon, you will see I didn’t finish doing) the play list I realized a few of things.  First of all, I cannot possibly put all of the songs of value into one reasonably sized play list. Secondly, I also cannot properly express the value (to me, anyway) of each of these songs by putting them in a playlist.  Finally, I realized that neither me, nor my dedicated (but rather small) socnet are going to be able to capture everything I want to say with what is available to us in our musical lexicon.

With all of that in mind I am expanding this little blog post into a not so little project.  A project designed to capture as much musical knowledge from my friends as possible, harness the knowledge and lessons therein, and share it in a meaningful way.

More details on that over the weekend (once I have fully wrapped my head around it).  But, since you all have been so patient waiting for me to put this list together… without further ado… the opening salvo in this little musical journey…

An hour (plus) that just might leave you better than it found you

Ps… I think my love affair with Christina Aguilera and India Arie shines through pretty clearly here, ironically, though, I did not contribute to this list, it is 100% provided by friends.  It appears my friendship “apple” doesn’t stay far from its “tree” either :)

PPS please please please suggest more songs in comments… I am beyond eager to have more great songs to listen to and share!!!

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